The Crux

Well, the gigs up, she done lost, that nurse has pecked her last pecking party. So, today we are all just having class, and she keeps making remarks about how all us guys are responsible for the poor sexual health of so many girls, and I stand up and I remark with laughter that maybe you should get drunk so much, and she just fly’s off the handle, but she doesn’t… you see what I mean, She just looks at me with that stare, and smile and says “Mr. McMurphy if you could please have a seat, or I will be forced to send you to the Principles Office. Now, something you gotta know bout the rest of the birds in this class, they don’t laugh, at all, she makes sure of that, Someone needed to show them that this teacher ain’t gonna hurt them. So I guessed it was my turn to try it. So I’s walk up to her, and smile, and say “You know, that’s exactly what they always tell me…” and I hooked my fingers in my belt loops and tilted back and winked to the class “Right before I do something like this, and I grab her heavy suit and rip it down to the underwear, and let me tell ya, there have never been so many cat calls made as someone went running out of a class, and right before those narc bastards came in and arrested me, Chief stood up, I mean stood up, not hunched over, without that foggy look, without general emo hunchbackiness right? And smiled, and laughed, and said, now this is the first thing I ever heard him say… so he says “That was damn funny.” This big goofball who apparently does some pretty goofball things ‘round school, by the name of Bartley, merely looked at me and smiled and nodded his head, he was mostly an exception to the things that went on in class, but the others, Harding laughed, Billy laughed; first laugh Billy had made since Homecoming, anywhere. And even that sketch in the back, Martini, who always likes to say bugs are crawling out of the overhead projector laughed, laughed like he had never laughed before, saying between gasps of air of how they “looked like over sized watermelons, just big over sized watermelons” of course the girls were a bit shocked, but they knew what was coming, I think I knew too, but you know what, it don’t matter, I brought life to that class, and I guess that what matters in the end right? Laughter? Hell, IF I couldn’t laugh all those times I’d seen some fucked up thing, I think I would have slit my throat along time ago. Well, this might be my last blog for a while, I have a sexual assault court meetin tomorrow, I guess if you like to look at a nice set of breasts your consider sexually dangerous, it’s ok, whats the worse they could do to me, cut it off? HA! PEACE! METALLICA RULES!!!!! R.P.M <3 Candy 4ever!!!!

McMurphy, OUT for the last time!

Last night was probably the craziest dance I been to in a long time, so it’s homecoming, you get me? Well, I get there, Me, Billy with Candy ( with a little help from me) Chief (who’s not looking so foggy lately) and Harding with his “girlfriend” I thought the Nurse’s hidden ones were nice, well this little hen likes hers out in front at all times, and they are a nice set to hold out in front on top of that! So we show up, and get this, they ain’t playin none of that good music, were’s the oldies, Hendrix, Simon and Garfunkel? No, they had this little prissy D.J. playing this goofy thump music as I like to call it. THUMP THUMP THUMP, then it’s got some goofy quote from some old science fiction movie like “the system is down” IDK, it’s weird, so anyway, I’m just laughing and having a hee haw time dancing with everyones date, and who shows up? The nurse, still in all that get up she wears, keeping the guys from getting down with their girls though it didn’t matter much to most, but when she got to the guys in my class she set them down and it stayed down till she was out of site. Poor Billy went running into the bathroom after she whispered something in his ear (rumor has it her and Bibbit’s mom are good friends, mmm I wonder) Candy started to run after him, but I snatched her up and layed her out on that dance floor when they finally put some danceable music on. The night went on, we left and headed to an after party, and let me tell ya, that was a party. Some goofy old black fella named Turkle showed up with some “cigarettes” and that’s when it got fun, we found some roller chairs and went to racing through the house, while someone had broken into the alchohol cabinet. Well, things calm a bit, and we are all relaxin, Billy and Candy disappear off somewhere, and BAM! The nurse comes running in with our parents, and I’m thinking SHIT! So they sit us down and give us the run down and Billy’s mom comes running in screaming that she can’t find her baby, next thing you know Billy comes out with this big smile on his face, and Candy looks a little flustered next to him, so we know what’s happened, His studder is even gone when he starts introducing Candy to his mom, until the nurse speaks up then he’s crying and stuttering begging not to be spanked or grounded, and Harding leans over and speaks in a whispering, rising voice “Awkward” and I just laughed, well long story not really short, we get taken home, and I’m locked in my room for the next four weekends, but that ain’t keepin me from seeing Candy or the guys anytime soon. ; )
McMurphy, OUT!

This nest...

So yeah, I moved into this quaint little place last week, and they stuck me in this school called New Trier, and let me tell ya, I’ve never seen so many chickens in a peckin’ fest. This one bird, goes by chief, he just sits in class and does nothing, just gazes out, looks like he’s lost in some sorta fog or something. There were some other feather-fluffers in the class I might just wanna keep my eye on. This one little chap who’s got this studderin’ problem, calls himself Billy, well I see him always looking this way and that, but usually he ends up staring at the little miss across the room from him, think her names Candy? Maybe? Well, anyway, this other bird, Harding, he’s got something going on in his head, that floaty voice, and flailing arms, I just wished he’d admit it, cause everyone else in the class likes to say it. But, special something gotta be said for the Teacher, who the rest of the chicks and chickettes like to call “Big Nurse” all on account that this is a sex-ed class, and she is if I heard right, a registered white skirt, though she sure don’t dress like a nurse, always in some straight flat suit, perfect up and down, ‘cept she’s got a nice set on her, which I reckon she tries to hide under those heavy suits she wears, but it doesn’t do her no good. I gotta say she’s got most of the guys in that class by the balls, they laugh and joke when she’s not there, but once she steps one of those low-heeled feet in that class, the air gets a little cold, and my little big man shrinks back inside, and I think it happens to every other rooster in there too. If the girls talk and laugh, she tells them to be more proper, sure, but if one of the guys mutters even something innocent as say a quick little dirty joke, she’s on them with that blank look, THAT LOOK, man that’s what really gets to me, that look, and that smirk she ALWAYS has, it’s not right man, someone should do something, she ain’t right, who knows maybe this bird will be the one to fly with her ; ) She’s also got herself three little teachers pets that like to tattle like a bunch of fifth graders, they also are always there, cleaning, and scoring perfect marks, I guess she needs bitches for the bitch work, funny thing is, their black, probably the only three black boys in the whole damned school, this north shore stuff is all money, I’m gonna get rich here, put don’t tell anyway lol.Well I’m off to meet candy for a little date, ^.^, can’t wait, talk to you birds later
McMurphy, OUT!